Sunday, January 24, 2010

The...beginning

So, 2 weeks ago I did what seemed incredibly insane and impossible about 9 months ago when I signed a couple of waivers - I completed the Walt Disney World Half-Marathon. As with most things in life, a lot of the experience did not go as planned.

It was incredible, to say the least, I was bursting with emotion, at so many times surrounding and during the race. I was holding back tears when I (finally!!!) got to the starting line (yes, the starting line), when I rounded the corner onto Main Street USA, when I saw my family at the entrance to Epcot (utter joy - I am so, so, so inexplicably grateful to Gary for suggesting we take the kids with us and for enduring the one-and-a-half hour bus ride and the freezing rain to be there for me) and it was almost more than I could take when I crossed the finish line and received my beautiful medal! And it certainly didn't end there, it was such a joy to see my team mates with their medals and to be congratulated over the course of the weekend by Disney cast members and fellow marathoners. Then, when I returned to work I had to hold back more tears when my principal announced my accomplishment to the school and I had many, many sweet children congratulating and thanking me - it was overwhelming and beautiful! And the encouragement, support and congrats from my friends and family has meant so much to me. I feel so blessed and grateful!

In a lot of ways this experience has been a lot like having a baby. It took nine months. I encountered a lot of things I didn't expect. I was able to accomplish something that just didn't seem possible. It was hard and painful, but so rewarding that I want to do it again!

When I signed up for the half-marathon, I shouldn't have. I was not in a good place health-wise - but something compelled me to do it (insanity?? - it could be argued). It really took me a while to get my health to a place where I could train. I started this journey, very much for my health. I was really hoping that weight loss would follow. It didn't. Some people have been very surprised when I have told them that I have lost virtually no weight - but it is true, it is the unfortunate, ugly truth - fat chicks can finish half-marathons. Who knew? I still have visions of myself looking spectacular in bike shorts, but I'm wondering if it will every happen. I had the same reaction to my exertion after finishing the half-marathon that I did after I did a 10K in the fall - "man, that would have been SO much easier if I were 50 pounds lighter!!!". So, as it turns out I find training for and finishing a crazy distance race EASIER than eating properly, far, far easier! For me, eating well, is the real challenge! So next time you see me eating something healthy, please tell me what a good job I am doing. I respond well to positive reinforcement. If you see me eating cake, just shut up. I really like cake.

I know it has been eons since I wrote a blog post. Who remembers Pedro? My heart rate monitor? I have a confession to make. I silenced him... quite a while ago. Seriously, I shut off his sound so he would stop beeping at me because I was sure that I would never be able to get a decent pace with his incessant warnings! Well, today, I gave him back his voice - and I even tried to listen to him. And it didn't go too badly (although, at the end of my run I came up to my block and decided to run all the way to my house, no matter what he had to say - evil, I know!). I plan to let him have his say from now on. My "run" today was mostly walking but that doesn't scare me anymore. Which brings me to what lies ahead.

I will be doing another half-marathon at Disney. My goal is to finish with a better time, and more importantly to finish strong (and I know that the only way that will happen is if I can finally lose the weight - get out of the circle!!!), the goal for the race I just did was simply to finish. I am fairly sure it will be the same race I just did. The ONLY discouraging factor about my experience this year was the weather. It was truly miserable - I have weather issues, I'm trying to get over it, I really am. I know it was a complete fluke and it probably won't happen again - and if it does, atleast this time I will know what to expect (to a certain degree) because like I keep saying, OK, so Forrest Gump said it, OK, so his Mama said it "life is like a box of chocolates, you just never know what you're gonna get". I didn't expect to get sleet OR horrific shooting pain that wrapped itself so completely around my knee but that is OK. Because I also didn't expect to find muscles in my legs that I never knew existed, or for my waist to shrink to where bending down isn't such a problem any more, or to discover the joy of listening to Disney podcasts, or the energy to get through most days without a nap, or the incredible generosity of my family and friends (truth be told I was very worried about the fundraising, because I have a hard time asking people for things) - I already knew how wonderful my friends and family are, but I was just extra touched by the donations - I just wish I could deliver the donations to my cousin with a hug. I didn't expect to start hitting a wall at the eighth mile and smash that wall with a clif shot and prayers for sweet little Samantha. After my knee went out I didn't expect I would jog any more of the race until I saw my own sweet babies and my heart soared and took my body with it! I didn't know what a boost I would get when I saw some of my team mates cheering me on during the race. I expected to meet some of the people on my team but I underestimated their awesomeness - I didn't expect to be so star-struck when I met Deb Wills, I should have expected it - that lady changed my life, I love her!

The only problem is now I love Disney World even more. I fear that if Gary reads that he might have some kind of episode. I think the excitement got to him a bit too - at one point he was encouraging me to do the full marathon and talking about doing it himself. He has since developed amnesia and refuses to come over the to dark side (or rather the pixie-dust-covered sunshine and rainbow side!). Poor guy, some women develop Coach and Gucci fetishes, I keep dragging everyone on vacation. Something needs to be done about me!

Until someone figures out what that is, I plan to keep running.

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